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This Halloween has already brought its fair share of spooky collaborations and scares, but this one is... well, a little different. Mojang, the company behind Minecraft—one of the most popular kid-friendly games—has released a temporary update called the “Scaredy Cat” update. Don’t let the cute name fool you, though. The update changes so much about the game that its age rating jumps from E (Everyone) to M17+.
Apparently, when you log in to Minecraft after the update, you're required to sign a 226-page legal document, hand over your banking info, and write a detailed list of your deepest fears.
Here are some of the most noteworthy features added or changed in the update:
Survival Timer
Your character now has a countdown timer ticking away in the corner of the screen. If it hits zero, you die. The only way to stop the clock is by eating, sleeping, and—wait for it—letting your PC mine Bitcoin for Mojang (you can enable this in settings, but you have to disable your firewall first).
Horror Game Invasion
Say goodbye to chickens and zombies. Now you'll face off against classic horror movie villains like Stephen King’s IT, Chucky the doll, and the sandworms from Dune. The twist? They’re rendered in terrifyingly detailed 3D, so you'll really feel the fear. It's like horror movie night—but you’re the star!
End-of-the-World Events
Random, world-ending events will happen without warning. A sudden void storm will appear in all modes sucking up blocks like a black hole. A gigantic blood moon rises, causing your character to scream in agony using soundbites from the traps in the SAW movies. Also, there is invisible fear gas that can spawn, making you hallucinate AI-generated images of yourself causing your parents’ divorce in painstaking detail. Fun times!
Haunted Chests
Open a chest? You won’t find any diamonds. Instead, you’ll be met with a list of reasons why you’re just not good enough. Can you imagine? After a long day of gathering materials, this is what you get. Just when you think you're ready to conquer the world, you get existentially roasted by a wooden chest.
Real Life Mode
In this mode, every injury your character suffers gets recorded and billed to your local hospital as though you received treatment without insurance. Nothing like seeing the true horror of the American healthcare system in pixelated form.
These are just a few of the features we discovered while skimming through the update notes (which we mostly skimmed the same way we skimmed the 226-page sign-in document). Mojang has hinted that some of these features might stick around permanently, claiming there's a lot of untapped consumer potential here. They've even teased a “Die in Real Life” mode, but they didn’t have the necessary tech to implement it—yet. Fingers crossed for next Halloween!
Source: Trust me, bro.
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